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Thanksgiving Jail Time: Part 1

Christopher Larue: Kind Of Funny, Not Really.

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It was three days before Thanksgiving and ironically, my liver probably looked like a torched ham.

My vision was blurry, but I could see the microwave clock blinking from the couch. ‘Oh, Fuck’ I said out loud, KNOWING that I was probably late for class, based on the amount of light streaming through my living room window. I quickly jumped to my feet and ran to the bathroom. As per usual, I fell asleep bottomless on my pleather sectional. The sound of my perspired ass cheeks unclenching themselves from the imitation leather was my regular, all too familiar wake up call letting me know I had, yet again, blacked out and disregarded my academic obligations.

My sociology professor was actually a push over, but I’d missed the past five classes and, at this point, I was almost positive that even if she were replaced with Jesus himself; he’d tell me to fuck off and retake the…

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